Open him up. What's the worst that can happen?
1. Every aliment, from minor paper cuts to death by head trauma, are initially diagnosed by requesting a ‘CBC Chem 7’ from an otherwise mute nurse.
2. ER doctors can never get a surgical consult when they need one. Surgeons prioritise every other hospital department over the ER. Despite it being, you know, the urgent one. If you need to whip out an internal organ, the best thing to do is just cut the patient open right there in the corridor and do it yourself.
3. You could have huge personal wealth or job offers of an easy life in private healthcare, but real doctors work on the front line- watching their colleagues get beaten, stabbed and infected by patients, as well as being generally overworked and underappreciated. All in the name of helping people (and the occasional free doughnut).
4. The introduction of an emergency airway through intubation is hard. But, if you work at a teaching hospital, you’ll get at least three attempts before someone steps in to ensure you don’t kill your patient.
5. Even the world’s biggest clichés sound deep and meaningful when spoken standing in a car park, bouncing a basketball.
6. Being an ER doctor is a terminal condition. Being landed on by a crashing helicopter, being stabbed by a patient, dying of a brain tumour, being exploded in an ambulance that’s been rigged as a bomb by the turkish mob, etc.
7. Fiercely urgent and dramatic music upon entry to the emergency room is de rigueur for the American healthcare system. (An area the NHS could really improve upon if my rather bland – if admittedly non life-threatening – trips to A&E are anything to go by).
There is always a phone ringing in the ER. Always.